Do you have a parenting style?

We all have different personalities, likes and dislikes causing us to have different parenting styles. However it is important to meet the basic needs of each child.

The four parenting styles are the ones most commonly referred to and parents usually fall in range between two of them. It is important to note that if you see yourself in a style that may not be healthy for your child to seek assistance.

Let us find out your parenting style and give you the tools to parent effectively:

The four parenting styles:

1. Authoritative– High parental expectation of the child while being supportive and understanding.
2. Neglectful- not recognizing children’s need for basics, such as warmth, food, clothing, physical affection
3. Permissive–  parents whom like to indulge and spoil their children
4. Authoritarian– demanding parents without support, expecting children to meet demands without showing them how to attain them and giving them the tools

Indicators of the 4 parenting styles:

Authoritative:

• structure in the household- bedtime routines, rules
• reasonable consequences if a rule is broken
• open communication with child without fear of punishment

Neglectful:

• child’s needs are not met whether it is physical or emotional
• no knowledge of child’s feelings, personal and social life
• not present for child whether at home, school functions and/ or events

Permissive:

• inconsistent rules
•  lack of structure or routine- for there is a want to please the child
• bribing children
• afraid of child’s outburst or frustration

Authoritarian:

• strict household rules that never bend
• unreasonable demands of the child
• insisting the child listen without explanation
• child is not allowed to make decisions or choices

Authoritative parenting helps children grow into responsible adults with a sense of security and understanding. Although at times it may be difficult for a child to accept parents demands they usually see that it is coming from a place of caring for the child and not selfish demands from the parents. Neglectful parenting is harmful for the child, for without the basic needs a child cannot learn and grow properly.

Neglectful children tend to grow up and neglect others for they did not learn proper relationship and communication skills.

Children whose parents were permissive throughout their childhood years have a tendency to be lacking in self control and grow up into demanding adults. They had seen that as a child by whining or complaining they got their way, thinking it might work as they grow older. They usually are self centered and do not respect authority.

Children of authoritarian parents may be noticed by low self esteem, constant anxiety and a wish to please others.

Although as parent we usually mix and match parenting styles it is important to keep in mind the effects of each style. Know that structure and support help build a child while the lack of it may break a child.